What Are Natural Consequences?

I have a sister who is 20 months older than me. My whole childhood, she was ahead of me in everything (obviously), and I just couldn’t wait to do everything that she did. One day, she came home from her first gymnastics class and did a somersault. Three year old me was mesmerized. I wanted so badly to be just like my sister with her beautiful, perfect somersaults. I practiced over and over and mostly just fell over the side. It got to a point where I was falling over myself so frequently that my mom instituted a new rule: Ashley can not practice somersaults without Mom. This solved the problem of frequency as strangely, Mom was only available to practice a few minutes a day.

Why are we talking about somersaults? Hang tight. It will all make sense soon. 

Being three and being all-consumed with the dream of a perfect somersault, I knew I couldn’t cut down my practice hours. Paris 2024 was so close! I had to work for it! So I began to practice somersaults after bedtime, staying on my bed to avoid the thunk of another failed attempt. I still remember my first perfect somersault. Chin tucked, thighs to chest. Perfect. 

Unfortunately, this perfect somersault took me right off my bed and directly onto the floor, head-first. Would you like to know what I never did again? Somersault secretly. Subsequently, I did not go to the Paris Olympics.

I tell this story because it has a clear example of an explicit boundary and a natural consequence. Being told “no” was not enough to deter child-me from somersaulting like a maniac. Falling on my head in the middle of the night (8:00 pm), was enough. It was a tangible, undeniable, cause and effect consequence.

Natural consequences are any consequence, be it negative or positive, that occurs without interference. It is simply a cause and effect occurrence. For example:

Natural consequences can be one of the most accessible forms of learning for children. Children are not rational. Offering children rational explanations for their behavior is not going to matter to them in the same way natural consequences may. While communication with children is undoubtedly important, young kids are unable to engage in a logical conversation about their behavior when they are in a heightened state. By allowing natural consequences, children can learn that their words and actions matter. They can begin to develop situational awareness and hopefully, self-preservation. 

For a while, I confused natural consequences with logical consequences. Logical consequences can still be viewed as a “cause and effect” experience, but they are implemented by adults. 

There is not a “one size fits all” consequence. Both logical and natural consequences hold benefits. Natural consequences can be inappropriate when the behavior is dangerous past what is appropriately risky. While your child would hopefully never touch a hot stove twice, this may not be the best situation to implement natural consequences. Alternatively, if your child wants to play outside without a jacket, there is a quick and accessible natural consequence (being cold) that may aid your child in the conceptualization of cause and effect.

As parents, caregivers, and educators, it is easy to put obedience on a pedestal. If our child obeys they remain safe, they learn, they are “easier” in a lot of ways. Natural consequences can be a release of the demand of obedience, and that can be hard. You know the outcome of your child refusing a snack, and it will likely make your afternoon more difficult than it needs to be. If your child never learns the “why” behind the “we nourish our bodies” rule, they will never have reason to follow it willingly. Sometimes, a safe allowance of disobedience can pave the way to willing and informed obedience in a child. Rather than stifling a child’s will and demanding compliance, natural consequences can increase curiosity and mindful engagement from your child. 

At Playcrafter Kids, we implement natural consequences as one of the primary means of behavioral guidance. Natural consequences are neither punitive nor disciplinary. They are educational. So much information exists that supports the benefits of experiential learning. This does not only apply to educational materials. Children learn boundaries through natural consequences. They develop logical thinking. They learn to look beyond themselves and their wants and into the impact their actions may have. At school, natural consequences can look like this (oh good! another table!):

We trust in the child’s ability to learn and explore natural consequences, and we are here to help on that journey. Some children respond beautifully to natural consequences, some children are Thomas-Edison-levels of curious and resilient. We celebrate both. There are 99 ways not to make a lightbulb, and there are 99 ways to jump into a puddle, get wet, and be mad about it. Kids try and fail and get back up. Our job is to note if natural consequences are accessible or not to each child’s individual needs. 

I think it is also important to acknowledge the negative or pejorative connotation of the word “consequence.” I have outlined many of the negative natural consequences, but positive natural consequences are equally effective and impactful. See the table below:

Natural consequences, both positive and negative, impact everyone’s daily lives. One time I locked my keys and phone in my car and subsequently had to overstay my welcome at a four year old’s birthday party. I was a visiting party princess and unfortunately Snow White’s noble steed was unavailable for transport. Natural consequence. 

Natural consequences must be age appropriate. The way that we implement them at Playcrafter Kids varies by age and need. Not all children can understand the natural consequence of skipped snack→ later hunger. If the consequence is not immediate, it isn’t always understandable. Similarly, for our older children, the immediate consequence is no longer surprising or educational, it is simply the result of cause and effect. Consequences are ever-evolving. It is our job as educators, caregivers, and parents to pay attention to the needs of our children, to note what is and isn’t working, and to celebrate the growth and changes we see in these dynamic little humans.